There’s a story behind this week’s theme for my 52 Cards Project, of course.

It began with a book landing on my front step. I had preordered it months ago to both support an author I’ve long admired, Teresa Reed, and because the idea of making tarot cards sounded kind of fun. And I don’t know, sometimes the universe works in mysterious ways, but I was feeling kind of lost creatively last week—maybe you could tell—and that day particularly, the day the book arrived, I felt especially uninspired.

So I began thumbing through the book and oh my! Teresa collaborates with an artist who is new to me, Adrianne Hawthorne, and the book is filled with her art, which is so colorful and joyful! I loved it!

I also felt this surge of longing. It’s the same feeling I get when I look at work from a few other artists I love. It’s not an urge to copy them — not to make art the exact way they make it (impossible and stupid!) — but I felt this deep desire to make art the way I make it.

I was inspired!

I looked up Adrianne on the internet and found more of her work (gorgeous!)…and then I came across this interview where she says:

“I hope that people feel uplifted when they look at my work. I use lots of vibrant color, pattern and sometimes fabric in my pieces and I’d like for people to feel the urge to express their true selves. We are all pretending at various points in our days, our lives. My work represents my authentic self, right now. I hope it inspires others to strive for their own authenticity.”

And that’s it of course. What I felt—immediately on impact—is what Adrianne hoped her work would make me feel: an urge to express my true self.

(I can only imagine the satisfaction she might feel to know her viewers get her art in the way she intends!)

In any case, that set my art practice back in motion. It is true. As an artist—maybe this is true for most artists, or at least at this phase of the creative journey—I am finding my way to making work that is authentically me. And maybe, I thought, I need to be even more deliberate on this search. Maybe dive into my heart and pull out what’s there.

And so I began—spelunking down, down, down…And that was my week.

I’m sure I’ll have something to show when I come back up for air!